Sometimes - like now- I'm so sick of how slow it seems, in reality, to change direction in your working life... I've been doing this PhD for about 5 years now. That's normal for people registered part-time, so nothing particularly lazy about my working habits there.
I'm just so tired of juggling jobs and academic research to change things. It's taking forever, and I'm getting impatient now.
Not because of the work involved - I really don't mind a challenge. I just feel like I'm stuck in a quagmire and not getting anywhere, just standing still in some pit of quicksand, or sinking, so whatever I do doesn't move me forward. It just all seems to stay the same, no matter what I do (and believe me, I always try to change things, always have.) I know all the theory about finishing doctorates... pace yourself, have regular treats, live a nice healthy life, sleep, good food, exercise, blah blah blah.... doesn't stop me getting sick of it all sometimes, though.
So I bide my time in a boringly sensible way, juggling various jobs and research as usual... I just wish I could speed things up a bit more, without losing the plot. I guess at this point, reasonably near the end, I just have to get on with it... but it's surprisingly satisfying to have a bloody good moan about it sometimes.
Ooh, aren't blogs useful for venting spleens- we had to use people for that, back in the old days!
Image is from a website purely about films with scenes of people sinking in quicksand and/or deep mud. I never knew it existed before, but how very appropriate today. I'll probably notice more of them now.
Update 14th Feb. Feel a bit guilty today about moaning so much in this post...some days, things are exactly the same, but seem fine. Actually, even rather enjoyable! It's a funny old life!!
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